"Homo sapiens is the species that invents symbols in which to invest passion and authority, then forgets that symbols are inventions."

   --   Joyce Carol Oates



"The hand is not quicker than the eye. The key to an illusion is to make the audience explain away the fact it has been deceived in plain sight."

   --   Mulholland.. ? - an illusionist.



Yes, it's another one of those 419 scam parodies.

On receiving one of those pesky mails I noticed how similar it was to religion in its structure. I also remembered this article: Annals of Crime: The Perfect Mark and thus felt inspired to produce these two pieces of blasphemy:


Antioch, AD 48,

From the desk of Mr Saul HaTarsi, this message might meet you in utmost surprise due to the fact that we have never met. However, it's just my urgent need for overseas partner that made me to contact for You this transaction.

I have not particularly lived my life so well, as I never really cared for anyone not even myself but my business. Though I was very rich, I was never generous, I was always hostile to people and only focus on my business as that was the only thing I cared for. But now I regret all this as I now know that there is more to life than just wanting to have or make all the money in the world.

I Am Contacting You on Behalf of one Mr Yeshua bar Yosef for a proposal which may be of everlasting profit to you. This transactin is 100% safe.

Mr Yeshua bar Yosef, whom I never have met, is the son of one Mr. Yaweh, whom I also have never met. You may have heard referred to as "Adonai". Mr Yeshua bar Yosef, who in addition to being the son of Mr. Yaweh is also in fact Mr. Yaweh, also was his partner in a very successful transaction involving the salvation of all mankind.

During this transaction Mr Yeshua bar Yosef in AD 33 died in an unfortunate incident involving imperial soldiers and jewish priests. You can confirm the genuiness of the deceased death by clicking on this web site http://www.bbc.co.uk/religion/religions/christianity/history/passionofchrist_3.shtml

Hence,i am inviting you for a business deal on behalf of Mr Yeshua bar Yosef who is nevertheless still alive and can now extend an offer to you which has previously available to inhabitants of Palestine only.

I have the opportunity to allow you everlasting bliss, in return for this you will to have profess believe in Mr. Yeshua bar Yosef and perform certain rituals for the rest of your natural earthly life which you may in no way to shorten at your own hand. Also generous financial contributions will to increase the chances of a successful completion of our business.

You will be required to believe unquestionably in the Holy Bible, wich holds the truth undeniable, unless clearly wrong, silly or downright evil - in which case it is be taken Symboliccally or dickregarded. It is not to be burned. You will be required to take part in rituals where you pretend to eat and drink Mr Yeshua bar Yosef, who is still also his father Yaweh.

Contrary to rumours that may have reached your ears there is no need for hate of Sodomites, women, jews or nonbelievers in order to enter into this deal, there however is no disadvantage to you in any of this activities. An unhealthy obsession with the sexuality of others is off utmoast importance, also eating pork is now, at the decree of Mr Yeshua bar Yosef, at your digestion. Dont't, i repeat, DON'T put rubber on unit.

If you are agree to my business proposal.further details of the transfer will be forwarded to you as soon as i receive your return mail. have a great day. yours, With Best RegardYour DevoterBrother Mr Saul HaTarsi.


Now, ofcurse, as anyone can see, this is a scam. Interestingly enough, it turns out victims of scams are now targeted for new scams where they are offered a chanche for redemption:


Mecca, 7 AH,

From the desk of Mr Muhammad ibn Abdullah Pbuh,

THIS IS TO OFFICIALLY INFORM YOU THAT YOU HAVE BEEN SELECTED AMONG THE MANY LUCKY VICTIM OF SCAMMED BY MR SAUL HATARSI TO BE COMPENSATED WITH THIS GENEROS OFFER.

I have to say that I have no intentions of causing you any pains so i decided to contact you through this medium. I am speakin on behalf of Allah, the one, whom I have ofcourse never met, this mesage has been relayed to me via one Mr Gabriel Arcangle (P Probably BUH) who I find very thrustworthy since he has no free will. This transactin is 100% safe.

To those of you who have been conned by Mr Saul HaTarsi (Could PBUH?) and his claim that Mr. Yeshua bar Yosef (PBUH) was a god and the God and the son of the God... now, who would belive such nonsense? .. oh wait you did! .. enyway - We can now inform to you that Mr Yeshua bar Yosef (PBUH) was in fact just a humble prophet of the one true God. We can trough our contacts offer you redemption for yor misguided heresy on this matter.

Trough this offer, hencefort refferred to as "The Deal", Allah can offer to bliss everlasting and 72 vergins and some wine for your to enjoyment, in return for this you will have to perform a number of rituals and generally behave very silly.

You will be required by "The Deal" to travel to Mecca once in your lifetime (which you may in no way to shorten at your own hand - unless sufficent number infidels are also killed by same act). Here you will receive dysentheria or cholera and will have to trow stowns at a rock that you must pretend you belive to be one Mr Shaitan Iblis, (P Certainly Not BUH). You might get killed in the stampede.

You will be required by "The Deal" to believe unquestionably in the Holy Quaran, wich holds the truth undeniable, even when clearly wrong, silly or downright evil - it is to not be taken Symboliccally or dickregarded.

Also required by "The Deal" to threathen by violense and rape anyone claming "The Deal" to be based on violent and obsessive principles, or otherwise makes drawings of Teddy Bears. You will also be informed that there is a death penalty for terminating "The Deal".

Flag burning and sandal trowing will not be required but for your own enjoyment. An unhealthy obsession with the sexual of others and yourself is 0f utmost impotence. You may put rubber on unit, but may not eat pork or any cloven animal which has not been tortured to death.

If you are agree to my business proposal.further details of the transfer will be forwarded to you as soon as i receive your return mail. have a great day. yours, With Best RegardYour DevoterBrother Mr Muhammad ibn Abdullah (PBUH). .